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Out Of The Limelight

August 12, 2014

‘I love this time of morning, don’t you?’

‘Yes, love it, love it, love it……. tiny crystal clear dewydrops on our backs, a wee bit transpiration and osmosis going on, lovely view of the garden. What else could a leaf want’

‘Well, we know what that would be don’t you!’

‘Oh come on, it’s a bit early in the morning to start with the “I want to be a flower” routine. I mean she’s not even awake yet. This obsession of yours is getting more floral by the day. Why can’t you just let it go, and be a beautiful blingy, zingy, greensy leaf like the rest of us.
I mean, I don’t know about you, but since Hairy Giant drowned us with that blue stuff the other day, I’ve felt invigorated, upsized, chlorofilled, in fact just bloody veintastic. So much so I’m thinking of turning over a new leaf……..boom booml….I’m here all week’
‘If you ask me, I think its frazzled your magnesium atoms. You’ve been on a permanent high ever since………..AND……you seem to be getting bigger before my very eyes. If you keep growing at that rate, you’ll tip over and take the rest of us with you!!
‘But, if that’s the case, how come you don’t feel the same’
‘I think Her Royal highness up there, stopped most of it falling on me, and, since I’m higher up the stem, you’re absorbing the rest. Look, I’m quite happy being a ‘normal’ leaf. Small, compact and bijous. If he throws any more of that stuff around, the place is going to look like a freak show ☺ ‘
‘Small, compact and bijous………that’s rich coming from a leaf who wants to be a flower….’
‘Ssshhh, don’t let her upstairs hear you saying things like that. You know how jealous she gets. She’ll start spitting out pollen, preening in the breeze, then the giants will appear and start peering at it with the big eye, then we get blinded by that flash, flash, flash. I mean blimey.’
‘Give over, you’re never stopped going on about how it gets all the attention, how we’re stuck down here in the shadows, dangling in the breeze, just so it can preen, preen, preen away all day in the limelight, that the Pink Giants smell it, fawn over it, touch it, admire it from afar. You’re even jealous that the bees visit it every day.
‘Well, it’s true. I’m told the bees fly for miles just to find the ‘Princesses’ of this world. They dive in, do whatever bees do inside there, and come out covered in that yellow stuff, grinning from ear to ear’
‘It’s pollen, they use it to make honey. They use it for food and the Pink Giants take the rest for themselves to put on toast……’
‘Toast…….?’
‘Yes……toast…..apparently the Pink Giants have something called bread, which they burn in a fire, slavver the bees honey all over it, then eat it with a cup of tea…..’
‘Really? ….. Bet they wish they were like us. We can have dinner and a drink whenever we want. Just sook it right up the big straw. Well, apart from the odd time when the well runs dry and the Pink Giants appear with that godawful green thing. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate them giving us some water when I’m starting to droop, but, do they really have to spray it at 600 miles an hour. It’s even worse when the green snake has a leak and you find yourself hanging on under a constant deluge. Anyway, how do you know all this stuff about the Pink Giants?’
‘Those guys……..over there…..’
‘You mean, the birds……’
‘Yes, they might annoy you first thing in the morning with their noisy chatter, but they are our spies in the sky. They know a lot more than you think they do, and, they give us plenty warning when dangers around’
‘Which is particularly handy when you’re stuck two feet up in the air!’
‘Oh come on, I do like them. Imagine how quiet it would be without them. Look there’s Blackie below us, I think he’s found one of those slimy snake things’
‘Yeeuuchh. How on earth can they eat those things. It even looks horrible. They’d be better burning that bread you were on about and slavvering honey on it! Oh no, down in one, that’s not right is it….?’
‘Oh, wait, here we go, suns up and your ‘Princess’ awakens – it’s a shame your green already…..’
‘Well, look at her, all yellow, silky and georgous. That’ll be us for the rest of the day, basking in her shadow like little green minions. Doesn’t she realise how important we are to her…..oops, watch out here comes a Pink Giant……it’s coming towards us…….freeze………………………what’s it doing, woah!, too close, too close……., arrrgh, duck, hide, run, well ok, curl up, shimmy…..whatever………what’s that he’s doing, oh no, what the silver things, ouch, OMG HE JUST CHOPPED HER STEM OFF…..!
……………. *silence* ……….
‘So what was that you were saying about wanting to be a flower, all yellow, silky and gorgeous……….?’
‘Yeah, ok maybe it’s sometimes better to stay out of the limelight…….😳’
‘Out Of The Limelight’ was brought to you by @qosfc1919 on Twitter and Dodo Productions © 2014

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